St. Martha

I went to bed last night with the resolve to re-group. I needed to take time to sit with my children, read the stories, play the games and do the cuddling. I needed to take a break from other activities and just be present to my little ones. I was thinking of the story of Mary and Martha and thinking how I need to be like Mary and stop and see Jesus in the face of my children.

But I woke up this morning to remember that today is the feast of St. Martha! She is the patroness of housewives...and I really needed that reminder today.

I think we often put Mary and Martha in two separate categories. Mary representing the contemplative life, while Martha represents the active life. Both are good and both have their necessary place. In life, I think we tend to flow in between these two expressions of faith, based on the events taking place in our lives at a given moment. Motherhood, understandably, falls under St. Martha. Perhaps though, in the midst of the housekeeping and child-raising, which are all beautiful, we can still find a little bit of Mary shinning through. We, as mothers and housewives, may not have the time to dedicate to our prayers or devotions that we once had. Prayer may often be for us, a fleeting thought of Our Lord, or a whispered Hail Mary in the midst of laundry. However, I like to think that while we are following the example of St. Martha, in serving our families, maybe we can still "sit at the feet Our Lord," and contemplate Him in a different way. We can reach out and connect with our children while we do our "chores," we can read a quick story between loading the dishwasher and picking up the living room and more importantly, we can touch and express our love to our children at multiple points throughout the day. This may sound easy, but I have found it to be quite a struggle recently, which is why it has been on my mind. Sometimes it comes easy, and sometimes it takes conscious effort. But, I think that in doing our housewifely duties, we can still contemplate with the heart of Mary, especially by reaching out to our children...Jesus speaks so loudly through them. I just need to remember to take the time to see that.

St. Martha, help me to always serve Jesus, through my family, with kindess, love and a smile (at least most days!) :) So that in serving them, I may come to see the face of Jesus more clearly.

Happy Birthday Rose Marie!

It has been four wonderful years since I gave birth to Rose Marie! I can hardly believe that so much time has gone by already! When people ask me how old my children are, I find myself practically stuttering when I say that I have a four year old.

This year, Rose Marie asked that I make her a "Candyland Cake." Candyland is her FAVORITE game to play! That little game has given the two of us hours of special memories. So, we gave her a Candyland Themed Birthday Party. Her favorite part of the party, happens to be the one thing that I don't have photos of! I decorated the downstairs of our home to resemble the Candyland Game. I used construction paper for the path and made various little obstacles that the kids had to go through, or climb over. We used the cards from the game and the children were the "pieces" that were moved around from spot to spot. We played it several times in a row, and even the mommies were great sports and jumped in to play as well! This was the part of the day that she keeps talking about. I am sorry that I don't have pictures of that part, but here are a few of the other activities:

1) Her cake! I have to admit...I was very proud of how it turned out. She was thrilled with it! She actually asked me if we could just blow out the candles on it, but not cut into because she wanted to keep looking at it. That made my day! :)

2) Sam, hitting up the juice boxes from the cooler. He was more than happy to take part in all of those special goodies that are reserved for "special occasions ONLY." And yes, in our house, juice boxes fall under that category.

3) The kids all decorated chocolate cookies that Rose Marie and I had made the day before. She loved making them, knowing that everyone would get to decorate them. It was a fun, tasty, mess!

4) Of course, we played "Brown Paper Bag Races." Rose Marie discovered this game during the cold, winter months and it is now the activity she looks forward to after EVERY shopping trip. So, we made it a party game! :)

5) Happy Birthday, to my big girl!

6) I love you Rose Marie! I am so incredibly grateful, that Jesus sent you into our lives! You are my comfort and my joy. I love these years with you, and I hope that they are as wonder-filled for you as they are for me!

My Little Man

Just thinking of Samuel, makes me smile. I really believe he is the cutest little man I have ever seen. That could be directly related to the fact that, he is a perfect replica of his Daddy, whom I also adore.

However, by nine o'clock in the morning I am ready for another cup of coffee, often wishing it were a stiff drink. By that time I have already, pulled Samuel out of the dryer, caught him mid-jump off the dinning room table/dresser/counter-top/seventh stair etc., reminded him not to dangle over the balcony, explained that Rose Marie's hair is not to be used as lasso, firmly reprimanded the stabbing of electrical outlets with screwdrivers and then followed that one up with, "We do not put electrical outlet baby-proofing stoppers in our mouths!" Sigh.

But then he comes over with those little lips and gives me a huge kiss, curls up in my arms with his blanket and a plea to, "Book read." He rubs my face so gently and even gives me a wink. How can I resist?! I am so in love with this little bundle of mischief and I am pretty certain he is using that to his advantage.

Truly, I wouldn't have it any other way. Each day is utterly unique with Samuel and I need to learn to laugh more and stress a little less...just so long as he lives through the day.

Floundering

Here we go, with one of those very honest posts, which I generally regret writing later on.

I am floundering. I feel completely disconnected from everything. I feel disconnected from my kids, my husband, myself and more importantly from my spiritual life. I think I am still in a state of shock after the move. For the past few weeks, every free moment has either been preparing to pack boxes or later, unpacking them with wild abandonment and now we are entering into a lull. I think I finally feel like I could catch my breath and somehow it hurts. I realize that doesn't make much sense, but there you go. It is how I feel right now.

I think I need to just stop. Say a few prayers, particularly of thanksgiving, play with my kids, romance my husband, read a book etc. Now that I write that, perhaps that ought to become my "To-Do-List" for the week. I am looking forward to this weekend, our first "real" weekend in our new home. I can't wait to curl up next to my husband and watch a movie while sipping on some wine. I want to play with the kids and be fun again. I think I feel like I haven't been "fun" in such a long time and I miss it.

For now, I am desperately trying to shrug off this feeling of "hurt," and overwhelmed and generally exhausted. Maybe I should start with a good conversation with Jesus over a nice cup of black coffee. Yep, I think I will start right there. :)

Idolatry

It is hard work to be worshipped.

Today, there was general frustration and tears from a certain little man in the house. I finally gave up, laid on the floor and then, miraculously, there was bliss. He came over snuggled next to me and sighed a happy little sigh. Then, he grabbed his cars and began driving them over me. Finally, Mommy was a highway once again. As long as I would lie there, he would bring toys over and surround me with them. I am pretty sure that if he could, he would have been burning incense.

Despite the worship service, this Mommy has things to do, and that is always a frustration to my fan club. But, I am grateful that for this very brief moment in time, I am the sun in his little sky. If becoming a highway, or being a bridge, or simply a nice place to lean on makes him smile, I am happy to be that. I know it won't last. So for now, I will get a few extra kisses from those tiny little lips before it becomes "uncool," and he becomes to manly.

We Did It!

We are on the other side! I am so grateful for everyone's prayers. We are back together as a family and gradually getting into the swing of things. Routine is still a long way off, but at least we have Daddy in our daily lives again. What a blessing! I am so glad he is here!

I hate to admit, that in the haze of boxes, movers, and attempting to find our things, I initially had almost zero "feelings" about our new home. I felt overwhelmed and just wanted to try to find the things I needed to get by. I didn't dislike our home, but I wasn't in love with it either.

Now, I am LOVING our new home! I am so excited to be here and I am thrilled with the new memories we will be making here. Today, I decided to forget about unpacking for awhile and I put the kids in the double stroller, and we went on a quest for new jogging trails. We were all so excited by what we found. Wildflowers were everywhere, we saw a fox, butterflies and birds, there was silence instead of car engines, and the best part, we could see the mountains! It was so beautiful! I had forgotten how much I love living in the country! I am grateful that I will be raising my kids around trees, mountains and wildflowers, as opposed to the city life we were in. I love the city for other reasons, but for raising my children, I am glad to be out in the country again. I know I will miss the restaurants and the shopping, but I think I am going to enjoy what we have right here. I know it will have its ups and downs, but I am hopeful that there will be more of the "ups." :)

Once I get some pictures, I will be sure to post them. Thank you all so much!